It has been a rather long time since I uploaded a written post on this blog, yet I have been feeling the inspiration to do so for some time now.
To start this of let me humbly share a wonderful teaching I received in a very unconventional way.
Two dudes from California
About a month ago, I was sitting at the central train station in Frankfurt, Germany and I was having a turbulent day, because I felt the irritation of myself subtly holding onto the idea that I had realised Awareness and that now I would never have questions again. I had questions running through my mind about the nature of reality and I kept holding onto the idea that a realisation had previously occurred, therefore I really couldn’t be experiencing any uncertainty. This naturally did not feel good, because it is not real. I kept thinking, “I got this, I have got all of it figured out, I fully understand the workings of mind as an appearance within my awareness… etc.”. I continued sitting, waiting for the bus as I relaxed and noticed two dudes, deeply involved in a conversation, coming my way and they walked at quite a fast pace, therefore I only heard a few words of what they were saying. One of them convincingly said to the other, in a wonderful Californian accent “Dudeee, it’s like… it’s like you don’t get it, because you’re attached to the idea that you got it…”. I just had to laugh at the way he said it, it was fresh out of a Hollywood comedy and to this day I have no clue what they really talked about, but his words definitely triggered a deep insight within me. He is so right: we don’t get, we don’t fully understand things as long as we are attached to the idea that we understood them, that we’ve gotten them.
It is important to understand attachment. Attachment in spiritual, intellectual, material, relational matters, is something I have faced quite often in my life . Whenever I had a realisation of some sorts, whether it be that the now is forever and the present is the only moment we will experience, or that the awareness, the immeasurable intelligence that is always already here is the fundamental ground of reality, the mechanism of attachment immediately kicked in and I unknowingly found myself in attachment alley.
Alleys are narrow, linear and limited, the same goes for attachments. What I know to be true about attachments is that they are a blocking of truth, so in some way attachments are distortions that usually end up hurting us more than serving us. Attachments are limits, because attachments require us to hold onto something and holding onto something requires us to make something out of nothing. Rather than giving complex scientific explanations on the deep psychology behind attachments, let us just think of why we get attached to things… We get attached to things, states, experiences, people, etc., because it gives us a sense of security and comfort. It’s like when we wake up on a cold morning and refuse to get up, because we want to keep nesting in the warmth of our bed, we really hold onto that experience until we really gotta get moving. So, attachment is a way in which we try to preserve security and comfort, yet does attachment really give us security and comfort?
Can’t we fully enjoy something, a state, a moment, an experience, the taste of great food, without the clinging onto, making-it-into-something attitude? Of course we can. It simply takes the relaxation of the attachment, so we stop creating the attachment anew. We let go of it, not in making something out of it and starting practice groups where we try to let go of our attachments, but simply by relaxing and letting go of the need to hold onto anything. This doesn’t have to be something we ruthlessly and ferociously follow through with for the whole of our life, because that is again making something out of nothing, but just to be aware of where we really are holding onto something and then experiencing the ease, the gratitude and the openness of letting go of holding onto it.
Thank you for reading, and may the wisdom words of the One Infinite Intelligence coming through the mouth of that wise Californian man be with you.